Chicken Salad Melts

So, this is just a tiny cooking adventure. More like a cooking jaunt? On this day, the first day of the year that truly feels like fall, we opened our windows (all two of them) wide and let the air that so immediately reminds me of apples into this little apartment. I cut myself some blunt straight-across bangs, and then remembered how limited our food options were because of the bullshit electrocuting stove we have. Last night I all but touched the burner, and I got electrocuted. It's a wiring problem and it'll get fixed, but until then, no stove. No range, no oven, no nothing! Luckily, we have a toaster oven, so that's how the chicken sandwiches got melt-y. If you don't have a toaster oven, AND if you have a broken bullshit stove like we do, then you'll have to eat these sandwiches cold. Pretty sure they're good that way too, just forget the cheese and pile on more crunchy vegetables, like cucumbers, peppers (I like that in some places outside of the U.S., the kind of peppers that you eat plain or in dip are called "capsicums" because I hate not having a way to verbally distinguish between the type of spicy peppers you add to things and the kind that you eat plain), or avocado! Next time I should mix avocado into the chicken salad mix -- you should, too. See, we're learning and growing together, I think.

Chicken Salad Melts

About 15 minutes to make

Makes 3 sandwiches

1 can of fully cooked chunk chicken breast (10 oz)

1/2 cup of Hellmann's Olive Oil mayonnaise (I would recommend using however much floats your boat, though, people are picky about mayonnaise)

2 t. basil (fresh, if you can!)

1 t. dried onion

1 t. oregano

1 pinch of garlic powder

1 T. yellow mustard

some ground black peppercorn

one shake of Lawry's (optional)

two shakes of red pepper flakes

Oroweat Oatnut bread (found at Target or any typical chain grocery)

Pepperjack cheese

Drain the can, mix all of it together. Mash up the chicken a little so you don't get huge, unmixed chunks of dry chicken. It's unpleasant. Spread this on a slice of bread, thickly if you're like me (I made more like 2.25 sandwiches out of the mix), and put relatively thin slices of Pepperjack (melts better) on top of the mixture that's on top of the bread (it's like Inception, in case you need clarification). Put the top slice of bread on, and put on toast setting in your toaster oven for about 5 minutes, or on your functioning stove low-and-slow for about 10, with a cover so everything melts and heats properly. When it's all finished, add tomatoes and lettuce and maybe an avocado slice or two.

If you'd like to be fancy, cook a fancy chicken breast and then put it in your fancy food processor. Really, go for it! But I don't have thawed out chicken (it's the last break before school! As if I'm going to have the foresight required to do that for a meal in the middle of the goddamn day, come on) or a food processor, so eat me.

Also, substitute mayonnaise for whatever sort of -naise you eat. Veganaise? Miracle whip (may the good Lord help you)? Whatever you prefer, but I can't vouch for anything flavorwise unless you use Hellmann's Olive Oil Mayonnaise. Same goes for the Oroweat Oatnut bread, which I highly recommend, for reasons both financial ($2.99 at Target!) and flavorful.

We ate these tasty sandwiches in bed while watching Netflix (King of the Hill!), and then had Door County peaches from this Saturday's Farmer's Market for dessert, and some pretzel M&M's. Overall, a really relaxing Labor Day.